It was my first run after her death.
I told myself I was going to do it. When the time came to get ready, I did not hesitate. I went into our bedroom and wore my gear and laced my shoes. I paused in between to glance at her side of the bed, took a deep breath, and finished dressing up. Everything I was doing brought back so much memories. But then I remembered what she told me in one of my training runs. "Go and God bless you! Come and see me as soon as you return. I love you."
It was beautiful outside. A warm late afternoon sun came to greet me. There was a gentle breeze blowing in the quiet neighborhood. The surroundings seemed so bright and cheery. Then I slowly took off to run. I haven't gone too far and I already felt exhilarated. I kept going and not too long, another runner was approaching and greeted me. Then shortly afterwards, a second runner came and gave me a happy nod. In one stretch of the road, a very good friend of mine saw me and literally jumped out of his car and gave me a big hug. I continued running with a smile in my face. Then it just came to me - my wife is with me. She was with me. It felt humanly real that awareness of her presence as I ran. I kept going for the next five miles and all I sensed was beauty and grace.
After the run, I drove to the cemetery and went to see her. It was almost twilight and the day was still beautiful. I stood by her grave marker and looked up the sky. I looked at the horizon and just felt at peace. I thanked God for the beautiful run. I love you, Love!